Miss decisive- a poem

 

Miss decisive

picture from: @pazel_global


Miss decisive, Miss complete clarity, uff, I needed a break

Letting myself make bad decisions is the best decision I’ll make

 

Sabotaging my relationships with people who love me most

Crying all day and spending my night raising a toast

I hate nightclubs here, but drinking is in trend

Getting the digits off that Spanish guy to only be a friend

Expecting the world from people who never cared

Not taking my stand where I should’ve ’cause I’m scared

Being beset by the drama I could’ve easily avoided

Sulking because of something stupid a random boy did

Sleeping close in this best friend’s bed tonight

Sharing everything on my skin while concealing my internal fight

I haven’t processed anything since my life switched gears

I’m choking on my tainted self-esteem and overpowering fears

I’ll be left alone because I confuse people

But when you have no one, you can’t lose people

This year, I’ll be shamelessly reckless and this year I won’t try to fit

Because this year is about me and me and that’s it

I wanna touch rock bottom before any attempts to fix

I’ll have to burn to ashes before rising back like a phoenix

Never encountered a personality catastrophe as strange

But crisis is the herald of change

Today there is no room for forgiveness, no room for anything fake

I know I’m better than this, but let me be this way for fucks sake

 

Miss decisive, Miss complete clarity, uff, I needed a break

Letting myself make bad decisions is the best decision I’ll make

-Maithili

 

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